A guy often extends a non-threatening invitation to a girl because he doesn’t want her to assume he is interested, even though he is. This makes it hard for a girl to reject the invitation by saying, “I’m not interested,” or “I’m dating someone,” because he was not straightforward enough.
Examples:
“Hey do you want to come on a hike with me and my friends?”
“We are going to ride bikes on Saturday, do you want to come?”
“Do you want to come to the movies with my friends and me?”
If you are into him, go, but expect him to ask you out on a date in the future. If you are not into him, go the first time, but the second time, politely say no.
Girls at BYU give their opinions as to how you can reject a non-threatening invitation.
“I would just say no thanks. I don’t know if I would keep saying I’m busy because then he would just keep asking.”
—Kristie Marx, Murrieta, California
“Just say no. Lay it on the line and say what you’re thinking.”
—Celeste Ingersoll, San Clemente, California
“Make it obvious that he’s just a friend and that you don’t want to take it further, but in a nice way.”
—Jenessa Cherry, Provo
“Ask if it’s a date, and if he says yes, tell him you’re not interested and that you would rather be friends with him.”
—Tori Whitworth, Glendora, California

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